Another task completed.

magic (305/365), originally uploaded by jnmerrit.

I did it. I followed-through, and now I can cross another task from my 101/1001 list. I got my third tattoo. I’m still a bit shocked that it’s there - for good. It won’t come off, and it’s in such a visible spot! But it’s me. Don’t you think? It speaks to who I am. It’s my magic. It’s my inner sprite-ness. It’s the fact that no matter what happens to me in life, i will always have me, knowing who I am. It’s about me getting through these recent life changes and knowing the entire time that I will be okay - because I am. It also speaks to my creativity, my inspiration, my future and my past (in this life and others). And on top of all that, it’s a beautiful work of art, that I am honoured to offer myself as canvas.

I am magickal.

I like poppies.

I found this photo in Claire’s photobucket account (sorry Claire, i was snooping!). I really love it. I almost considered painting my bathroom that colour. But then I saw the paint chips (yep, went so far as to get chips!) under the vanity lights, and it hit me - I can’t do it! I can’t have a bathroom with pee-green walls. The reflection alone would be enough to make me look awful, let alone the feeling of… i don’t even know what.

Nevertheless, I do enjoy this colour combination, and now I’m going to show a few more poppies that make me happy.

Someday I’d like to have my own poppy-filled yard. No need to cut the grass.

Someday I will find someone who can love me as much as I love him. And not be afraid of the feelings that come with that love. And someday I will marry this person, and I will have simple, beautiful flowers like this.

I love this Poppeeeee too! He is my Fantastical French Fred (Alfred, formally).

And this is just cool. So are you. And so is Carrie, for coming up with colour inspiration for my bathroom. Thanks for all the comments and suggestions. I’ve decided to move out of my apartment instead.

Seriously!

I don’t love it anymore.

Bathroom - Love that Shade!, originally uploaded by jnmerrit.

I’ve been sick of my bathroom for a while now. Because of all the changes in my life, I feel I need to switch things up. I’d like to repaint, repersonify. My bathroom has a Parisian theme - I hate themes, why did I do that? - so it needs to be brought back down to earth.

Any ideas? I love photos…

Oh, hi there!

Have you wondered where I’ve been? I seem to have dropped off the face of the earth. This blog is usually a place for me to write about happy, pretty, wonderful things, and unfortunately, I haven’t been feeling very wonderful lately.

To briefly explain, my four year relationship has recently ended, and I’ve been in a state of fear, sadness, and limbo. I’m very greatful for the support of friends - both people I know in real-life, and those on-line who have surprised me with their kind words. Thank you to everyone, it means more to me than you could possibly know.

My creativity took a bit of a dive for the past three weeks, but last night I started a ‘Feelings Blanket’ using colours that represent how I’m feeling. It’s an intuitive blanket and I’m using a large granny-square pattern as inspiration. I will be documenting this progress. I also plan to finish some of my WIPs, including an order for a local shop. Redecorate my bathroom. Celebrate my birthday (it was on March 30th, but being a week into the breakup, I did not feel like being happy yet). Purge a lot of my belongings. Do some of the things on my 101 list. Move to Ireland for a few months. Let life happen as it happens.

This is a time of change for me, and another sign that I need to let go of control. Life is aligning itself to force me to do things on my own, so I’m going to follow my intuition and let it lead me where I should go.

I’m going to let myself ‘feel it all.’